Blog Archives

3rd house Awareness to Pluto’s 4th house Departing- Transiting Saturn as the Awakener, Saturn square Moon

This post began last year in August but for some reason I did not finish it.  But I am a Mercury retrograde conjunct Saturn in Pisces native with its ruler in the 3rd conjunct the SN. My thoughts sometimes go back down into the ether waiting for just the right trigger…and BAM. Somebody done pulled the pin on that grenade and I think it was Saturn.  I’m also thinking even though Pluto is now firmly in the 5th house, it’s still sitting on the cusp of the 4th and 5th houses.

The inspiration for the original post and now realizing what should have been part 1 of the 3rd house Awareness to Pluto’s 4th house Departing, came from a post on a astrology group that I used to be involved with. The question presented to us-when or what were your worse transits. I said July/Aug 1979. Now I don’t remember exactly what month it was.. but I know it was summertime, after school was out (June), after the holiday (July 4th), after my birth mother’s birthday and a hot early Sunday morning. OK to clarify since I use and will be using the term birth mother and birth father -I am not adopted. I had also mentioned that Saturn thru the 12th conjuncting my Moon the last time it was in Leo was also rough because it brought that life altering event day back to my memory as I had for years carried on as if nothing happened and how I had glossed over the reality of my childhood. Saturn’s conjunction of the Moon was the beginning of a new Saturn cycle about events and situations of the Moon and looking back at all that has gone on before.

So, as I edit this post transiting Saturn is conjunct my natal Neptune setting off Big G-my grand square or g-square as I like to call it. Big G consists of  my 3rd house Neptune conjunct the South Node in Scorpio opposing the 9th house North Node in Taurus squaring the 12th house Moon in Leo and the 6th house Venus in Aquarius.  This is the 1st square of Saturn and the Moon since the conjunction. And whatdayah know, my Progressed Moon has recently crashed in on this party as well conjuncting my North Node along with the Progressed Sun in waning conjunction. Ah ha…transiting Saturn opposing the Progressed Moon. The 4th/10th dynamics that I briefly mentioned in the last post at play here.

And adding fireworks to this party-Uranus. Yep, Uranus. The crazy part is, I just realized Uranus has been poppin’ off smoke bombs of wake your a** up in Big G for the last 3 years. First by sesquisquare/sesquiquadrate (135 aspect) to my Moon when @ 5-6 degrees of Aries. When Uranus moved to exact conjunction of my Sun, it activated my Sun/Venus semi-square, something that I picked up on and wrote about in “Transiting Minor Aspects-Not So Minor”.

Pluto has also dropped its own A bombs in the G starting with the Moon while in the early degrees of Capricorn while plowing through my 4th, stealthily leading the charge of reformation.

Then it hit me to go back and re-read to connect the dots…something I do a lot with a natal Mercury retrograde.  In Liz Greene’s book “Saturn- A New Look at an Old Devil”  she says this:

There is much that goes on within a human being of which he remains unaware, and this does not apply only to repressed emotions…If the individual makes no effort to expand his consciousness so that he can understand the nature of this total unfoldment and can begin to cooperate with it, then it will seem that he is the pawn of fate and has no control over his life. He can only earn his freedom by learning about himself so that he can understand what value a particular experience has for the development of his whole self. And nothing stimulates a man into this kind of exploration faster than frustration, which is the gift of Saturn…”

Erin Sullivan in her book “Saturn in Transit” refers to transiting Saturn as “Awakener”. Liz Greene basically says the same thing above. I know you’re saying Saturn as a Awakener?!! WTH are you talking about?!! Saturn is the task master, the disciplinary, the authority, the oppressor, the blocker, dark, heavy and all those things that sound absolutely nothing like a awakener or liberator, right? I was thinking the same thing when I first read that statement too.

But it really is true. For one thing Saturn ruled the sign of Aquarius before Uranus was discovered and is still the co-ruler of the sign of Aquarius which is well…the awakener, the liberator.  How and why do I see Saturn as a awakener?

Well when Saturn was in Leo and transiting my 12th house, I decided to stop putting relaxers of any kind in my hair.  That was an awakening/liberation/rebellion whatever you want to call it,  from the accepted standard of straight hair as the epitome of beauty. Saturn crossing my Ascendant took that awakening/liberation/rebellion even further by making dreadlocks of my hair. I also began to study astrology starting with my chart to find out why I was not feeling like my normal, relatively cheery, I’m here to help, let’s get stuff done self. Awakening my mind which the Moon represents in Vedic astrology. During this transit as I also began to acknowledge whether I wanted to or not, the repressed emotions about the very traumatic even in my life that occurred in 1979, the sexual molestation from my birth father, and the emotionally abusive relationship with my mother for the first time in my life.

Saturn transiting my 3rd house activating the mind and now square my Moon has awakened/liberated from the grave, the 12th house Moon secrets for the first time about that event in 1979 to family other than my husband and now to the world. It’s also made me face the reality of my 12th house Moon and let go of the hope (Neptune) that I have or ever had a family.  Like Liz Green said in the quote above, ya gotta EARN your freedom by doing the work. Pluto, Uranus and Neptune started the deep background dirty work but Saturn has laid it on the table in 3D where even Ray Charles can see what’s been going on.

To be continued…

 

 

Enhanced by Zemanta
Advertisements

Pluto has left the “house” for good!

Been a minute since I posted last as there has been quite a lot happening emotionally since that last post which I’ll be writing about in the future posts. I’m guessing that was the final going away gift from Pluto.

Speaking of going away….YES!!! Halle-freakin-lujah!!!

Sometime this morning after a 15 year occupation of my 4th house, Pluto has packed up and moved out for good!! That deserves a big happy face and celebration!! 🙂 🙂

Ascendant transits-Saturn Connections from the 3rd pt1

Give What You Have

 

Saturn is making a 3rd sextile to my Ascendant since entering the sign of Scorpio last year, as it transits my 3rd house. Not sure when it’ll be exact as it is within 1 degree, but it’ll be soon.   And man have I been filed with tons of self-doubt about well- everything.  You’d think since this is going to be the 3rd hit and a relatively harmonious aspect that I’d have it together and not be fearful of doing-this.  Writing. Communicating in general but specifically…about astrology, since I am not an astrologer.  But we are talking about Saturn so that should not be too much of a surprise.

You see, in my natal chart Saturn and Chiron are conjunct my chart ruler Mercury retrograde in Pisces in my 7th.  Yes, my Mercury is in its detriment and it’s retrograde so most probably would say that’s double detriment…conjunct Saturn and Chiron, triple detriment.  And Saturn rules my 5th.  Great! Not only is the way I go about life full of obstacles, pain and challenges, my fun and creativity-the stress relief valve, does not flow easily either. Before I knew anything about astrology, I used to think that so imagine how I felt when I did start to learn astrology. Until I realized, I don’t see or approach the world the way most people do.  It’s definitely in a roundabout way that I manage to apply some structure to. However, it’s not in the “normal” microwave, gotta have it right now way society functions.

Recently I was looking back at the elementary school report cards I still have. Yeah, that was eons ago. lol My 2nd grade teacher wrote me up for talking too much in class and that I was a slow worker in doing my assigned work. Got in trouble with the parents so I seriously curtailed my speech from that point on, really cracked the books and tried to be invisible. After that I started getting As & Bs. That’s great and shoulda made the parents happy, right? Nope. I was then told that I only had book sense but no common sense.  What a crushing thing to hear from your parents as a 7, 8-9 year old kid.  That continued as I went through high school as well. Now this did not stop me from achieving academically (was #38 out of a graduating class of 603) but I did not do as well as I could have due to fear of really seeming like a smarty pants to my folks, mainly my mother but my father basically went along with whatever she said whenever he was home. Coupled with the fact in my culture, you were not supposed to be an intelligent female…what, how dare you?!

Water poured into my gas tank so my car can’t move.  That’s how I think of the Ascendent as your car. Why..I mean I’m your kid? Afraid I might dig around learn something I’m not supposed to know? Or get an education to learn something that might enable me to have better choices and do better than you?  Push repeat play on that mix tape of fear into my ear, ” You aren’t smart enough or have sense enough to see, think or have the skills to do anything “. Better yet, “No man is going to want you”.

But now 30 years later, it’s different…but a bit the same. Because it’s transiting Saturn, I like to look at it in the same way one looks at the Saturn return. After all Saturn in its travels around your chart will not only return to its natal position 30 years later, but will do the same to the other points/planets in your chart. Hence a new beginning or level of maturity to be expressed in this area of the chart.

Ah. I now realize that I need not fear “driving” along my path and I need not fear being who I am, which IS good enough, regardless of who likes it or not.  I’ve acquired many skills and probably discovered some that I was born with but depressed by those fearing and maybe even jealous of. How can someone younger possibly know more? Going deep, questioning, analyzing, exploring. Got lots of goodies in the bag and it ain’t no junk.

Saturn has been beneficial as well by making sure Jupiter’s expansion does not get out of hand but at the same time putting effort behind Jupiter’s ideas. Hence the launch of this blog. The thought has been on my mind for some time but honestly I was scared to do it. Heck I’m still scared. That’s one of the reasons why it takes me so long for me to do a post. Writing…and really communication for that matter do not come easy to me. Though Saturn has also helped me to put more effort into my astrology studies by putting myself out there via the World Wide Web. Still gotta discpline myself more but Saturn has given me the push to cut down some of the distractions of the 3rd house. I have Jupiter in Gemini, the sign that naturally rules this house so that also means the distraction level is even higher. Saturn is teaching, if it’s not necessary, it’ll be done at a later time or cut out all together.

Hmm,  it seems to me that the Ascendant is more than a mask. True, it’s what we present to world but I think it’s the vehicle that transports the planets in your chart around, so they can do their thang to help you grow and evolve throughout your time on this side of the earth, with the ruler(S) as the wise chauffeur.  As least that’s what I think Saturn says…;-)

Transiting Minor Aspects-Not so Minor

Do any of you look at the minor aspects of the transiting planets? They have captured my attention for a while now as events and/or feelings emerge but I can’t see anything based on where the planets are and they are not making any major aspects to anything in my chart. However, when I count up the distance the transiting planet is from my natal planet…ah ha!

One case in point…Uranus in Aries is conjunct my 8th Aries Sun. My Sun, Virgo Ascendant and Gemini MC are the only thing I have in the lower tens, single digit degrees in my chart. So only looking at the normally used major aspects, conjunction, sextile, square, trine and opposition, the only aspect Uranus appears to be making is a conjunction to my Sun. Going with the traditional meanings of Uranus conjuncting the Sun in the 8th would probably be something like this-an unexpected (Uranus) sexual encounter (8th house) that makes one shine. Hmph!! It really pisses me off that sex is the one of the main descriptions of the 8th house. The other one- inheritance. Both are non-issues for me and clearly are not hitting close to what is going on in my life. Until..

I remember that my Sun is quincunx my Ascendant and semi-square my 6th house Venus. The semi-square is hardly ever talked about as a natal aspect and even less so by transit.  So if transiting Uranus is conjunct my Sun and in the natal chart the Sun is semi-square Venus, then transiting Uranus is semi-square my Venus. That also means that transiting Uranus is affecting my 6th house. Uh yeah, it sure has…in everything that Venus represents and 6th house matters.

Getting back to the other aspect to my Ascendant means that the Uranus/Pluto conjunction is being brought out to the fore, though it will be more so when Uranus aspects my Mars. Transiting Pluto is also semi-square my Venus and squaring my Sun. Also transiting Chiron is semi-sextile my Sun.

I have felt every one of these so-called minor aspects. Uranus and Pluto as I mentioned before, is calling for my Sun to come out of the shadows. Just this week I had to stand up for myself by saying no to a responsibility being put on me ( care-taking of someones child ) because it is the traditional responsibility of a female. Nope, I am not a “traditional” female.

English: This is an image of the planet Uranus...

English: This is an image of the planet Uranus taken by the spacecraft Voyager 2 in 1986 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If I was supposed to fill that role, I don’t think I would have been born with Uranus/Pluto conjunct my Ascendant combined with a Sun/Mars Aries conjunction and that Mars quincunxing Uranus and Pluto. My 4th and 5th houses are empty, my Venus is in Aquarius, I have nothing in Cancer and I’ve never had or wanted to have children. Helllooo!! This also brings up the hurt (Chiron) of not being seen for who I was by my father (Sun).

You see, my normal modus operandi prior to the mid-life transits was to try and do whatever I could to help out, irregardless of the cost to me and my well-being. Now I’m not saying this to paint myself as a saint. Nope. I’m actually embarrassed because I realize how I was basically a sucker and how much time and energy I have wasted on other folks self-created dramas. Time, energy and money that could have been used to find out my own dreams. Carrying this further is the fact of folks thinking they only have to talk to my husband about something that involves both of us. Excuse me?! This is 2013 not 1943!

So not only is my core getting a makeover but the vehicle in which my Sun is to travel in to do what it came here to do is being made over as well. Kinda like stripping the layers of paint off an antique piece, revealing the original finish underneath. That description is very àpropos because I grew up with mega fixed energy parents. My father was a Taurus Sun/Mercury/Uranus conjunct with an early degree Jupiter/Saturn conjunction in Taurus as well and Pluto in Leo. My mother is a Leo Sun/Jupiter/Pluto/North Node conjunct in Leo with Mercury in the late degrees of Leo and Mars in Taurus. See what I mean?

As I looked at the natal aspects that are being activated in my chart, I read in my books on these transits. “Alive and Well with Uranus“, “Alive and Well with Neptune“, “Alive and Well with Pluto” and “The Twelve Faces of Saturn” all by Bil Tierney are excellent books on the transits of these planets in the houses of your chart and the contacts to the planets in your chart.  While he does not cover the minor aspects or the major aspects specifically, he gives a very detailed description of the aspect contact.  Here’s the title to a section on Uranus/Earth Venus transits: “Breaking Habits” Yep, breaking the habit of always saying yes because I don’t want to be looked at as mean if I say no to a way of being that society says, I’m supposed to say yes to. A title for the one of the Air/Venus sections: “Rude Awakening” Oh yeah, definitely.

What I’m getting at here is that by looking at the minor aspect contacts, and reading on those contacts in addition to the obvious contact being made, the astrology starts to make sense. How do you make sense of the transits compared to what’s happening in your life?  

 

 

Ascendant Transits-Jupiter Connections pt 1

A wider view of Jupiter and the Great Red Spot...

A wider view of Jupiter and the Great Red Spot as seen from Voyager 1 in 1979 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

What I have somewhat neglected to recognize consciously is the fact that my Ascendant has been receiving laser beams at it by all the outer planets starting with Jupiter and including the North Node. I’ll talk about these in future posts but in this one I’ll talk about Jupiter.  Don’t be surprised if there is another post to go along with this one.

Jupiter in Cancer,  while in the single digits have sextild my Ascendant and explains the yo-yo effect on my appetite and the way that I look at life. At first I started back craving sweets and my all time favorite potato chips. Then the cravings kinda went away or maybe I should say I’ve had more willpower (Scorpio) and discipline (Saturn) to control the indulging the last few weeks. Taking a risk of sounding like Martha Stewart, “that’s a good thing” because my waistline has expanded from all those (Jupiter) size bag of chips I have been eating…by myself. I am definitely an emotional eater and the emotions have run on overdrive as I go from being optimistic, well somewhat optimistic as being one of those happy-go-lucky totally optimistic is so not me, to totally pessimistic.

Maybe one day, I’ll be optimistic. Nah, I doubt that…too Plutonian.

Now Jupiter in Cancer so far has delivered more than just the bag or three of chips lol.  As he’s traveled through my 11th house, he’s gifted me in the form of expanding my network. More accurately, I’m finding my tribe which is basically what a family is. The difference being its with people who are not related by blood.  And the best part… you get to choose!

Again, a good thing as finding these people has helped me feel more secure in learning, expanding, exploring and sharing the Uranian part of me that has been forced underground since childhood. That goes for the Plutonian part as well since they are as one in my natal chart.

I’m reading “Exploring the Astrological Key to Jupiter” by Stephen Arroyo so I’m sure I’ll have more to say later.  And hopefully my posts will get better.

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Astrologer Nancy Fenn, RIP

English: This is an image of the planet Uranus...

English: This is an image of the planet Uranus taken by the spacecraft Voyager 2 in 1986 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

No sure if this is Uranus transiting my 8th house and conjunct my Sun related, but I was very shocked (Uranus) to learn that astrologer Nancy Fenn had passed (8th house) a few months ago.

I was on her email list and I have had a few mini specific topic readings done with her that I still refer to 5 years later. I also helped her albeit very briefly with prep work of drawing up charts on astro.com for her readings. I never thought about it until now but she really was the first person to introduce me to an actual birth chart other than my own.  Now for some strange mysterious reason, I dropped off her email sometime in 2009 I think.  Well, Neptune is in my 3rd house and I have a 7th house Mercury in Pisces-both retrograde so that kind of thing is really not all that uncommon in my life.

How in the world did we end up crossing paths again? I was doing a search on some astrological topic as I usually do and an old post of her’s on her blog came up. I remember reading that post when it was first published but as a Mercury retrograde native, I tend to re-read things a lot-mainly because I almost always discover something else I did not pick up on before and/or I get a better understanding the 2nd time around.

So I decided to see if she was still blogging since this particular blog post was written in 2008.  The last post on this blog was 2010. I thought this was kinda odd but not so much since I knew she had other websites and might have been more active with those. However, something told me to click on her Facebook badge. That’s when I found out the news.

How or why do I think this is related to my 8th house Uranus transit? . The notification date on Facebook of her passing was May 19. May 19 was my deceased father’s birthday, who passed away suddenly of a heart attack in 1998. Leo rules the heart. One of the things the Sun represents in the birth chart is the father/authority figure.

Now how does this relate to Nancy Fenn as of course, she was not my father? I tend to think the planets in your chart can represent real people in your life. Don’t quote me on this but I think Nancy was a Leo Sun. The sign that the Sun rules is Leo.  Uranus rules things like astrology and sudden events. Uranus is also aspecting, though via a minor one, my natal Mercury.  So putting it all together, sudden insight via astrology about your father and/or an authority figure. True for me in both cases as I’m learning more about my father via astrology and Ms Nancy was an authority figure for me at the time, about astrology.

In closing, I remember her asking me why did I want to take part in her little experiment in which I replied “It seems like it’s moving me along my North Node path and it’s (astrology) helping people to understand themselves. Of course, I’m only getting the charts ready so you can do the reading but it’s something and it’s helping me to learn”.

Thank you Nancy Fenn for being a brief though positive influence in my astrological world .  RIP.

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Maiden Voyage in the Astro Sky

SpaceShip One

SpaceShip One (Photo credit: Jonathan Thorne CC)

Inspired by my midlife transits of Saturn opposing natal Saturn, Uranus opposing natal Uranus and Neptune squaring natal Neptune, all aspecting my natal Mercury, I ventured into the blogging world in 2008.  I had also started studying astrology beyond the common Sun sign astrology.  However I was a bit reluctant and afraid to put my thoughts out there so my writing was mainly about my new journey which I will talk about astrologically later and a few things I talked about on my YouTube channel with a scant few references to astrology.

Fast forward to 2013, with these outer planets aspecting my natal Mercury, all though this time via the so-called minor aspects and more knowledge gained of myself, I’ve been inspired or shall I say compelled to get my astrological thoughts out there. Hence the birth of this blog instead of writing about these topics on my other blog.

Oh my-I’m looking at my Current Planetary Positions app and lol, Mars is now trine my chart ruler Mercury and Mercury is trine my Mars, with Uranus conjunct my Sun and Jupiter square. Sorta fitting huh.

I hope you will Join me as RamBull (you’ll see later where this comes from) through the stars on my journey to self discovery and hopefully it will shed some light on your journey to self discovery as well.

 

Enhanced by Zemanta
%d bloggers like this: